I know I am early, but I am not risking missing it tomorrow, so happy birthday babe! I love you dearly. I think about you frequently. I do miss you a lot - I love my family and am enjoying my time on vacation, but I long to be with you and grow weary. I keep watching the film, “The Iron Lady,” while on the ship. I love it. I want to grow old with you. There, I said it. I think absence does make the heart grow fonder. Maybe it is a mixture of “absence…” and “out of sight, out of mind,” but in regards to you, it’s the former, not the latter. Just know that I started writing you a letter and a postcard. Send me your mailing address, please. Much love, Aiden. Take care of yourself and enjoy your time with your family. My mom and sister send their love. So does Shylah’s godmother, Farrah.
I miss sleeping next to you, and fucking you. That is all for now.
From A Time of Pain without Love
I cannot forgive you for handing me a box
To lock away my heart
To store away my soul
And along with it, my deepest love for you.
You told me to hold back the “I love you’s”
And I told myself “For him, anything.”
I cannot forgive you for sharing with me your veil
To mask away our troubles
To cover up our worries
To keep face in front of our friends and families.
I painfully crafted a smile
And my heart painfully rotted away.
I cannot forgive you for taking out your diary
To record our love
To scribble down my name
Like some kind of dirty little secret.
Your tender touch melted into venomous disregard
Under the scorching stares of your peers.
And so I smashed that fucking box, slowly shredded your veil, and burned every page of that diary.